The Middle One Says...

oh you have your period? well you have two options.

you can use sanitary pads, which make you feel like you are wearing a diaper, and have the added fun benefit of being extremely uncomfortable and give you the extreme paranoia that they will not be enough coverage and at any moment with any movement or sudden sneeze you'll bleed over onto your clothes and walk around all day with blood stained trousers while everyone points and laughs at you.

a penis shaped wad of cotton that you shove uncomfortably inside yourself and it catches the blood before it leaves your body.

wait! it gets better! there's the outside chance that using those will kill you!

HAHAHA! that's funny. no, you have to pay for them. and they're really fucking expensive.

oh, and if you tell anyone that you ARE on your period, your judgement, opinions, and reactions are going to be dismissed as the crazy ramblings of a lunatic.

what third option?